Dear Barnabas
by TheBitterAftertaste
Summary: When Barnabas gets a knock on the door from Angelique's lawyer, what can he expect to find?


A/N: I really wanted to try something different; so I have taken it upon myself to write a letter, which I haven't actually done through fiction so it should prove interesting! With regards to 'The Way I Loved You' when I get inspired I shall write!

Barnabas yawned, not happy with being disturbed when he was trying to rest. It had been an eventful few days and now that Angelique was destroyed and he had Victoria for the rest of eternity, surely he would be relieved, grateful even. But he was not.

He knew he was very much to blame for Angelique's self destruction. He had not admitted it at the time simply because he was a coward, and if there was any chance he could say now what he had playing on his mind to her, he would have not felt the weight of the guilt pressing down on him like it was now.

As the rest of the Collins family were out, trying to get a few days away from what had happened Barnabas had been left with Victoria in a house just off the coast whilst the Manor was being rebuilt. There was a knock at the door and Barnabas stood, brushing himself down before walking and opening the door, revealing a small, older man with a briefcase in his hand.

"Mr Collins, I am Ms Bouchard's lawyer and I have come to discuss matters of importance." He said quietly as Barnabas nodded, stepping aside and letting him inside.

"I have no business ties, nor personal ties with Ms Bouchard so I do not understand why you wish to speak to me, forgive me for being direct." Barnabas answered, a little confused as to why he was here as the man nodded quietly.

"Well following her death we have read her will and disclosed her items to those she has wished to give them to, that is including you Mr Collins." He replied placing his briefcase on the table and opening it. Firstly he took out a contract.

"Ms Bouchard has given you the full extension and contract of Angel Bay cannery, and has also left you with a sum of twelve million, thirteen thousand five hundred and fifty dollars." The man informed him handing him the contract as Barnabas' eyes widened, he could not fathom as to why Angelique had given him so much, especially considering their history.

"There is one final thing, she wished for me to give you this." He said quietly handing him a book as Barnabas' eyes watered almost immediately. The man saw this as a good time to leave and showed himself out as memories flooded through Barnabas' mind.

_**Barnabas had found Angelique crying in the kitchen when he had run through; attempting to sneak some food up to his bedroom. He immediately stopped and looked at the upset sixteen year old who tried to wipe away her tears.**_

"_**Angelique what is wrong?" He asked softly, he had never seen her cry and it was almost strange to think that she had feelings like that, she had always been so quiet, so cold to everybody. After much persuasion she finally revealed the reason she was so distressed.**_

"_**The other Maids, they laugh at me, they make fun of me because I cannot read, and I cannot write." She whispered her cheeks burning with shame. Barnabas immediately felt sympathy as she was the youngest servant in the house; yet had been working there for the longest amount of time. She hadn't had any**_ _**education.**_

"_**I will teach you to read and write Angelique..." He whispered. He stuck to that promise, and after many days of lessons they both triumphed as she was able to read a small simple story with him. **_

_And that was the book she had given him now..._

It was small things like that, that had hurt him the most as he flicked through the worn pages, looking down when a small envelope flitted to the floor. He bent down and picked it up, before sitting down on the couch and tearing it open and taking out the sheet of paper inside and began reading.

_Dear Barnabas,_

_If you are reading this, then I have died. It sounds ridiculous writing such a thing because you will obviously know that and so will I. I felt it most fitting to write a letter to you that you would read, as that is how our past collided. _

_I have done some terrible things to you, and your family, and thinking about it now I don't understand why. You and I both know what happened between us all those centuries ago yet you chose not to bring that up, but bring my jealous rages and anger instead. _

_When I was seventeen years old you handed me the book I have placed this letter in, and it is my most valuable treasure. I have money, and I have a large business, but you always had something I didn't and that was what I loathed about you. You had family. _

_My Father died when I was very young, and my Mother could not afford to keep me so I was sent to your family for work. It hurt then, but I now understand why she did it. But at five years old having everything you love being torn away from you is quite a drastic thing, and this is what led to my demise. _

_You were the first person I loved. The person I gave my heart, body and soul to. I know I wasn't your first, you told me that much. But I also remember the night on January 23__rd__ 1844 when we laid on the couch in the drawing room and you told me you loved me. _

_You can burn this letter; destroy it like you have destroyed me. Yet you know deep down what you said. I hope that when I died you would tell me this, and I hope you did but if not then it is alright, because I know you are reading this now. _

_I wish it hadn't ended this way, and I wish we could have been together, but I cannot let you blame yourself for that, as that is my fault. But when I saw you walking down the stairs at your Manor for the first time in two hundred years, I felt myself alive again. That I will not be embarrassed about, that I will not be ashamed of. _

_The night you told me we could not be together, was the worst night of my existence. After you said you loved me I did not know what had happened. I blamed myself more than anything. I blamed the fact I wasn't rich enough, or pretty enough, and certainly not smart enough. We had our first argument then, and I remember it so well. You rarely lost your temper with anyone, you were kind and gentle, but that night you said some horrible things to me, things that will be forever etched in my mind, things I cannot and will not forget. _

_I do not wish to reminisce in the past anymore, as what's done is done. I am sorry things ended so badly, and I did not ever mean to hurt you, I just wanted your love, something I thought I had before, but I never did. _

_I am sorry, and I love you._

_Angelique x_

Okay that was it! Hope you enjoyed please review!


End file.
